The thing I found to be so inspiring about this is how he held his focus for about ten years. And he accomplished his goal.
It is so easy to get distracted, to make excuses, to find reasons why you can't do "x."
I had a friend tell me once that the obstacles I felt I had were more inside me than outside me. She thought it was a matter of changing my thinking. And by doing this, that would naturally change what I did, which would alter my context / circumstances. She was absolutely right. I only wish I could have heard her earlier in my life.
Furthermore, I wish someone had challenged me at 17 to try to save a million dollars. I may not have made it, but I most certainly would have been farther along financially than I am now. And who knows? Perhaps I would have all those zeros attached to my name! : )
PS I am headed to a conference and will not post until next week …
So I have this grandiose plan for a studio that will function both as a place to create art, and also a location to write. It has a fireplace and a two leather chairs and these amazing huge white boards that slide on tracks near the ceiling so that they can overlap or be side by side, as need be. These are places to note flexible, large ideas and the process to bring them to realization. Sigh. In my dreams.
I realized today that so many of my ideas are waiting for this space. Waiting, falling through the cracks, losing momentum.
So this weekend, I scaled down to a realistic size:
I bought two poster boards to tape to my closet doors. I will use sticky notes so that I can move ideas around. Ghetto, yes, I know.
I haven't given up on my studio, but really, who knows when I can pull THAT off. Certainly not in the near future.
My poster boards are not glamorous. But they let me START. Which is way better than not beginning.
My personality type has a healthy (unhealthy?) dose of idealism. I tend not to want to have any part of something if it isn't done right (Go big or go home). But if you talk to any investor, they say, "It doesn't matter how big or small. Just start, and then do it consistently."
So this is my small investment into my writing future: two $0.49 poster boards. And a pack of Super Sticky notes [some of which are like little stars : )] And a sharpie.
Who knows, perhaps Rome was founded in such a way … except they used "stone stickies" : )
Have you ever thought about all the components of your day and just sat with them for a few minutes?
I tend to be very in the moment, and if this present experience is negative, then it's pretty hard to feel good about my life. However, if I review the day, generally, there are some good things that have happened somewhere along the way.
That's where I want to place my focus.
Perhaps as you go through your day, you can "mark" a place that you want to remember as being positive. Then when the irritations and hard places come (and you know they will) you can say, "Yes, but remember – that's not all this day has been."
For those of you who MISSED the amazing cello / piano duet from yesterday's post … (and there were several of you). If you did miss it, your experience was 'less-than', and yet you didn't even know it, until it was pointed out to you.
Perhaps this is what emotional blindness is; you think you have all the information and you believe you are perceiving things correctly … until your metaphorical eyes are open and all of a sudden you realize that there is more out there.
The interesting thing to me is that sometimes, people realize for a split second that there is more to be had, and then they turn away. We all know people like this; there is a moment of insight that could lead to depth … and then it's as if it were a bit of smoke that just dissipates and is no more.
[There is a gravitas in the second half of life, but it is now held up by a much deeper lightness, or “okayness.” Our mature years are characterized by a kind of bright sadness and a sober happiness, if that makes any sense. There is still darkness in the second half of life—in fact maybe even more. But there is now a changed capacity to hold it creatively and with less anxiety. It is what John of the Cross called “luminous darkness,” and it explains the simultaneous coexistence of deep suffering and intense joy that we see in the saints, which is almost impossible for most of us to imagine.]
Recently, I received some very sad news for me. My heart is broken and my life will be forever changed. The challenge in mature life is to feel the sadness acutely, and yet know deep within that I am okay.
We tend to either feel the grief and plunge into depression or despair –
or, we go into denial mode
or productivity mode
and we MAKE ourselves be okay through sheer busyness.
LIVING
within the tension of
"I am firmly in the grasp of God's passionate love for me"
and "My heart is singing a dirge and conducting a wake"
… this is artful living.
Not there yet, but inviting Jesus into this space.
